Yesterday was stressful.
I had a dentist appointment.
I’m a head case when it comes to the dentist. I can’t even explicitly put my finger on why. I had some rough visits as a kid, but it’s not like they were completely traumatic experiences. And in general, I don’t tend to fear pain in a clinical setting. I’m fine with shots: I’ve given myself about 10 gazillion subcutaneous injections this summer for a treatment that’s supposed to get me a healthy baby. I’ve never broken a limb, but I broke my thumb once and my toe twice and I don’t think I was a wuss about it. (Well, okay the thumb was when I was kid, so I was probably a wuss about that.) I’ve had various miscarriage-related procedures that were supposed to be painful, but I went in fairly calm and collected. And, oh, I did a 17-hour non-medicated labor with my son by choice. By choice! (A choice I seriously doubted in the thick of it.)
So why do I shake like a leaf in the dentist’s chair when that drill starts up??? I get myself into such a tizzy to the point where I’m nervous for a day or two leading up to my appointment and then the tension of the appointment itself causes a massive headache for the 24 hours following.
I cried yesterday in the dentist chair. Straight up, the dentist was wiping my tears away for me in between drilling. So. Flipping. Embarrassing.
In my partial defense, the last time a dentist tried to fill one of the cavities this dentist was currently filling, he was unable to get me numb. (Hence the switching of dentists.)
I was also on my period.
Anyway. I survived. Zero pain. Four cavities filled. Bing, bang, boom.
And the dentist was super nice about the crazy-woman-tears too. I wanted to be like “YO! I’m not a wimp! I swear! You shoulda seen me push my son outta my vagina!!!”
But my mouth was too fat with numbing drugs.
That’s probably a good thing. I don’t think the dentist wants to hear about my vagina.
Speaking of my vagina and that thing I pushed out of it…. (My son. In case you didn’t get that) … The other stressful part of the day was dropping my son with someone to watch him who wasn’t my parents! That’s pretty rare for us because my parents are ALWAYS available. But this month they’re off galavanting around the country in their motor home. Those selfish, selfish people. Off having fun, enjoying life. Totally uncool.
Anyway, in trying to figure out how to get away with free childcare, I found a
victim mom in our playgroup willing to watch RJ for me on the promise that I’d watch her son, in exchange, the next time she needs someone. It actually went quite well, and there was nothing to be stressed about. He was so distracted by ALL THE COOL TOYS and OMG MOM THEY HAVE A DOG and SHE KEEPS FEEDING ME MELON YUMM YUMM YUMM that he hardly noticed I was gone.
I did take secret pleasure today, though, in the fact that he was a little extra clingy at Toddler Time and freaked out a bit every time he lost track of where I was. So maybe he missed me yesterday, just a tiny smidge.
He painted his first painting today at Toddler Time. He titled it:
“That Time My Mom Abandoned Me”
Can you just see the toddler-anguish in those angry, hurt brush strokes?? Poor, talented baby.